Wednesday, November 16, 2011

GED Test - another reason teachers drink


Here is another reason that teachers drink !!!!!!

GED Test







The following questions were set in last year's GED examination 
These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds).


Q. Name the four seasons

A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar

Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink

A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large  pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists

Q. How is dew formed

A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire

Q. What causes the tides in the oceans

A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight

Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on

A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed

Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections

A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election

Q. What are steroids

A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs             


Q.. What happens to your body as you age

A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental

Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty

A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery              
 
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes

A. Premature death

Q. What is artificial insemination

A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour

A. Keep it in the cow                                              

Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)

A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E, I,O,U..                                                                 

Q. What is the fibula?

A. A small lie

Q. What does 'varicose' mean?

A. Nearby

Q. What is the most common form of birth control

A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium             

Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome

Q. What is a seizure?

A. A Roman Emperor.                             

Q. What is a terminal illness

A. When you are sick at the airport.                 


Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?

A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas

Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning

A. Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.                     

Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?

A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight   

Q. What is a turbine?

A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head




Floods in Thailand 2011

A positive spin of the recent floods in Thailand (Sept. - Nov. 2011). People should always look for silver-lining!

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Friday, November 11, 2011

A picture worth a thousand words

GAMBAR MEMBERI SERIBU SATU CHERITERA






Gambar yang amat menyentuh hati….seorang anak yatim melukis gambar "mama"nya dan tidur bersama lukisan itu.

sekiranya kita ternampak anak-anak yatim berikanlah mereka bukan hanya barangan material seperti makanan, tapi beri mereka pelukan dan ciuman yang jarang mereka dapat tetapi amat diperlukan dan dirindui....

Why Is the Ocean Salty?

By About.com Guide

Question: Why Is the Ocean Salty?

Have you ever wondered why the ocean is salty? Have you wondered why lakes might not be salty? Here's a look at what makes the ocean salty and why other bodies of water have a different chemical composition.

Answer: It's really easy to understand why the ocean is salty. The oceans have been around a very long time, so some of the salts were added to the water at a time when gases and lava were spewing from increased volcanic activity. The carbon dioxide dissolved in water from the atmosphere forms weak carbonic acid which dissolves minerals. When these minerals dissolve, they form ions, which make the water salty. While water evaporates from the ocean, the salt gets left behind. Also, rivers drain into the oceans, bringing in additional ions from rock that was eroded by rainwater and streams.

The saltiness of the ocean, or its salinity, is fairly stable at about 35 parts per thousand. To give you a sense of how much salt that is, it is estimated that if you took all the salt out of the ocean and spread it over the land, the salt would form a layer more than 500 feet (166 m) deep! You might think the ocean would become increasingly salty over time, but part of the reason it does not is because many of the ions in the ocean are taken in by the organisms that live in the ocean. Another factor may be the formation of new minerals.

So, lakes get water from streams and rivers. Lakes are in contact with the ground. Why aren't they salty? Well, some are! Think of the Great Salt Lake and the Dead Sea. Other lakes, such as the Great Lakes, are filled with water that contains many minerals, yet doesn't taste salty. Why is this? Partly it is because water tastes salty if it contains sodium ions and chloride ions. If the minerals associated with a lake don't contain much sodium, the water won't be very salty. Another reason lakes tend not to be salty is because water often leaves lakes to continue its trip toward the sea. According to an article at Science Daily, a drop of water and its associated ions will remain in one of the Great Lakes for around 200 years. On the other hand, a water droplet and its salts may remain in the ocean for 100-200 million years.

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Monday, November 7, 2011

STROKE IDENTIFICATION


During a party, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine and just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes. (they offered to call ambulance)

They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food - while she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening. Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - at 6:00pm , Ingrid passed away. She had suffered a stroke at the party . Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today.

Some don't die. They end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead. It only takes a minute to read this...

STROKE IDENTIFICATION:

A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke...totally. He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough.

RECOGNIZING A STROKE

Remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!

Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster.
The stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.

Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions :

S * Ask the individual to SMILE .

T * = TALK. Ask the person to SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently) (eg 'It is sunny out today').

R * Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS .

If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call the ambulance and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.

NOTE : Another 'sign' of a stroke is

1. Ask the person to 'stick' out their tongue.
2. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other that is also an indication of a stroke.

A prominent cardiologist says if everyone who gets this status shares it; you can bet that at least one life will be saved.

And it could be your own.
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